What do I mean by “Recreating My Life”?
I’ve known in my heart for many years that I wanted to be able to go wherever my heart led me, perhaps make a living online or something, but how?
On Saturday morning April the 20th in Oakland CA an intangible life changing epiphany came over me (it involved a catfish but that’s another story) letting me know that I didn’t need to know “the how”.
I didn’t need to worry about how things would work out. How I would achieve financial security and the many other things that scare us into not living our dreams became almost magically non-issues. I’ve described it like something just cracked open my head and poured in whatever it was.
The message was very clear that not only could I live my dreams, but I should! And most of all THAT I DIDN’T NEED TO WORRY.
That by going with the creative flow within me (I know that sounds corny but it’s the best way I can describe it) and letting the path lead me it would all be good. In fact it felt like it would all be great. (At the time of this writing, it’s been 3 1/2 months since leaving my old life behind and I can confirm that this feeling had amazing merit and was absolutely worth following.)
Not gone completely but much more manageable were the fears of leaving my adult children to live their lives (they know mom is just a flight away), leaving the comforting rituals of everything that is our day to day lives- time spent with friends and loved ones, my favorite Circle K where I liked to get my morning coffee, exercise routines, caring for the plants in my garden, our home and the view out my kitchen window of my window box, the skylines I love, the birds I’ve come to know, the wonderful neighborhood children… everything. Yes, I would miss all these things but it would be ok.
As soon as we got back into Orlando, I jumped into action. My mind became very busy with solving all of the challenges that this would entail. It’s not that easy to deconstruct your life and just take off and live off the grid or wherever your heart leads. Thankfully, I have an amazing, loving and supportive husband who has been behind me and this sudden redirection 100%.
Leaving a town where you’ve lived for over 30 years, where you’ve raised three kids and established yourself deeply into the community. Putting a business that you’ve started from scratch on a shoe string and invested 10 years worth of hard work into aside. Giving up the stability of predictable income.
Now that’s hard.
But after this feeling of freeing my spirit to follow wherever it wanted to go all these things became so so much easier to deal with emotionally than I ever thought they could be. Even though there were fleeting moments of melancholy and difficult tear filled goodbyes, it all still just felt so right.
My New Year’s resolution for 2014 is to tell this story. To tell it as I live it. To try and capture and share the joy and magic that is unfolding in my life. There will certainly be challenges and misfortunes but what would life be without them?
I’m happy to have you come along for the ride. If it in any way serves you to find greater happiness, hope or inspiration in your life, if will all be worth it.
So here we go…on the way to happily ever after, wherever that is 🙂